








I rushed to the bathroom wondering if I had wet myself. Nothing like that had happened to me before. Instinct told me I was leaking amniotic fluid, but I did not want to jump to that conclusion yet. I stuck a pad in my underwear and went back to my regular morning activities. A few minutes passed and I felt another little trickle. I called Brad and told him to come home.
Brad came home and immediately began getting to work packing things and organizing things. I called my doctor and they told me to come in if I suspected that my water broke. I was planning on waiting until my contractions became more intense before leaving for the hospital, but since I tested positive with Strep-B, I needed to be admitted into Labor and Delivery as soon as possible. We spent the next hour or so preparing to leave and making arrangements for the children. Meanwhile, my contractions were beginning to become more regular-- about every 3 to 5 minutes. I went to take a shower right before we left and that's where I knew without any doubt that my water broke, because it began trickling down my leg full force as I stepped into the shower.
We were immediately admitted when we arrived at the hospital. My labor and delivery nurse, Corene, began monitoring me and baby David to make sure we were progressing okay. Corene confirmed that I had indeed broken my water and I was about 3 cm dilated. She was not pleased, however, with how David was progressing. David's heartbeat was not normal, and I had not felt any movement from him since early that morning. Corene notified my doctor immediately. Dr. Kaelberer arrived at my room, checked our progress, and concluded that I needed an emergency C-section. Before I knew it, I was being whisked away in my bed out of my room and into the hallway.
Everything happened in a blur, but I was not scared or worried. I remained calm. For some reason I knew everything was going to be okay, even though all of my expectations and plans were changing right before my eyes. I only began to get emotional when I realized that having a C-section would mean I would end up being away from Lizzy longer than I had planned, and that broke my heart.
The surgery itself went very well-- far better than I expected. Even when the doctor told me I would feel pressure and tugging, I did not feel a thing. I felt as if I was floating on a little cloud, high up in the air, far away from everything sharp and pointy down below. The surgery was very relaxing, actually, even though it was under very stressful circumstances. I'm sure all the drugs they pumped into me was what made me feel so relaxed.
I remember hearing David cry for the first time. It seemed surreal. Was that really my baby? Was that person making that noise really my child? A huge smile came to my face as I realized that it was him and that he was alive and seemed well. Brad was told to go see him. My heart screamed out go, go, go! I wanted him to take as many pictures and videos as he could since I couldn't see anything behind the blue curtain. Then I waited. I waited and waited and waited. Why wasn't David crying again? I heard a little bit of commotion, but I could not tell what was going on exactly. Then I heard him cry again. It was a weak cry, but it was still a cry. Brad told me he weighed 7 pounds, 7 ounces and he measured 21 inches long. He was born at 12:40 pm on Tuesday, October 4, 2011.
I later found out that David had stopped breathing while the nurses were attending him and had grown pale and limp. I am so glad I did not know that at the time!
The second half of the surgery seemed to take a very long time. The nurses were working on David the entire time a few yards away from me, though I could not see what they were doing. I did hear the nurses say that David would not stop peeing and pooping on them. Hearing that made me smile. When it was time for me to leave the room, they brought David to me. He was all bundled up in several blankets, with only his face showing. I noticed that he had very round cheeks and cute puckered up lips. I heard one of the nurses say, “I think he has his daddy's coloring.” I was a little loopy and tried to kiss his face, but I was wearing an oxygen mask so all I did was bonk him on his face. Instead of kissing him I petted his checks with my fingers. His skin was so soft and perfect.
After being wheeled back into the labor and delivery room, I found myself alone and shaking. I was freezing cold. It took Brad a while to come see me again. He told me David was having a hard time breathing on his own. I remember feeling a little worried and sad, but at the same time I was not too concerned. After all, Lizzy had a little trouble breathing after she was born, too, but she was fine and normal within an hour. I had expected the same thing to happen with David as well. I did not realize how serious the situation truly was until later.
Over the space of the next few hours, we learned just how serious little David's condition was. Not only was he having trouble breathing and needed assistance, but he also had hyperglycemia and did not have enough glucose in his blood. Later we found out that he had an infection as well; a mystery infection that he caught somehow before he was born. Little David was very sick and was battling for his life. If my water had not broken, or if I had refused to have the C-section and insisted on a natural birth, little David would have most likely died.
My heart was aching to see David after being wheeled into the maternity ward. I was told he would not be leaving the NICU during my stay at the hospital, so in order to see him I would have to visit the NICU on the first floor. I wanted to see him so badly, but I had a mild fever the first few hours after my C-section, and I was prohibited from seeing David until my temperature returned to normal. As soon as the fever was gone, the nurses let me go downstairs to the NICU with Brad to see our little son. It was around11:00 pm at night-- so almost 12 hours since he had been born. He looked so sad and helpless in this little bed covered with wires and tubes around him. I remember reaching in to touch his perfect little feet. His skin was so light and pale, and his eyebrows and eyelashes were completely blond. His hair was a golden-brown color. I told Brad, “He doesn't look anything like me!” We sang “Candy Hearts and Paper Flowers” to him, and “All the Pretty Little Horses.” I choked up during the songs and was not able to finish them.
Holding David for the first time was an experience I will never forget as long as I live. Brad and I went to see David the following night. I did not expect to be given the chance to hold Baby David since he looked so poorly the day before, so it took me by surprise when the nurse told me I could hold him. The nurse handed me David and I held him Kangaroo style, skin on skin on my bare chest (this is called Kangaroo Care). I remember breaking into tears and sobbing with Brad as I held David in my arms for the first time. David was so tiny and sweet. I felt so much love for him and all I wanted was for him to get better quickly, so I could take him home and hold him all the time.
The next few days went by slowly and painfully. Baby David continued to get stronger and healthier every day, but it was still a fight for him, and we had disappointments and scares along the way. After I was discharged, Brad and I had to figure out the endless juggling act of spending time with the kids at home and seeing baby David at the hospital. We spent a lot of time driving to the NICU and back home again after I was discharged, and I spent a lot of hours pumping milk . David spent a total of 10 days in the NICU. He came home on October 14, 2011. We are thrilled to have him home with us.
I love you so much, David! We are so happy to have you in our family.
Love always,
Your Mama